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How bad do you want it? 

As I lay in my bed on a rainy Sunday that is the question I kept asking myself. My workout partner was sick yesterday so she ended up cancelling at the last minute. I was already awake and it felt great outside so I decided to go for a walk. As I was walking I decided I would try to get 10K steps before making it back home. I did it but it felt like it took forever. I hit 10K before 8am and then only got 4K steps for the rest of the day. That’s pretty sad especially when you consider how horrible my eating was also. My friend let me know last night that she wouldn’t make it to workout today. I woke up and checked the weather to see when the rain would stop so I could go walking again. Of course it is supposed to rain all morning. So…do I stay in my comfy bed or lay on the couch and binge watch some show? That’s what I wanted to do if I’m being honest. It’s so easy to be lazy. I could come up with a thousand reasons to stay home and really only one pesky reason to get up. I want to be out of the 300 pound club before 40. My eating has not been the greatest but I’ve attempted to exercise each day. I’m worried it is not enough though. I haven’t weighed myself since last Wednesday and don’t intend to until this coming Wednesday. I don’t want to know if I’m falling short to the goal because then I think I would really become more lazy. I wouldn’t necessarily give up on losing weight but I would not work as hard to do it. I know that sounds crazy but that’s just how my mind works. So…how bad do I want it? I got my big ass out of bed and went to the gym. I want to lose weight but I know I’m not doing all that I can to do it. Somehow I need to combine wanting it with discipline to eat right and workout twice a day. Baby steps. First you have to get up! 

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